Monday, 26 March 2012

Getting on Track

Alright, finally a post from the comfort of my bed and laptop. Might be the last for a little while if I get everything backed up "tomorrow" to get it fixed this week.

Anywhoo, I will do my commenting round in a moment. Sorry for slacking in that department. Blogger is REALLY hard to use from my phone, and the app is stupid and won't sign out of my old one so I can't even get on with it. I hope to get a little netbook when I get my taxes done so I can hop on quickly every day with it once I do. I might just sacrifice extras next pay and get one really, they're only like $300 max.

So, eating hasn't been great, but not absolutely horrible. I haven't started counting cals yet, but I am going to be soon. I need to get on top of that. The 26min walk every day to my bus stop is good, but without cutting down huge on cals it's not going to do anything at all. I also hope to get my taxes done to join the Y this week, instead of having to wait another pay or two...I stupidly spent like $80 on crap this week though, so my own fault.

I have; however, been cutting. Almost every day. I bought an exacto knife the other morning. It's perfect in a sense because it easily cuts without going deep, and is such a smooth and even cut that it heals in a couple days and never leaves scars. I know, it's not the smartest or healthiest option for relieving stress but I'd rather this than to start smoking again, emotionally eat, or to just drink my way through life, as much as I'd love to be buzzed 90% of the time...lol I did buy a bottle of fruit wine yesterday morning though. I would've much preferred a mickey of rum or vodka but the LCBO doesn't open til fucking noon on Sundays. Won't make that mistake again!

"Today" has been a pretty shitty day over-all though. I didn't get home from running around til almost 2PM and when I woke up at about 10PM I had a massive migraine and a voicemail from my mom. Our dog, Hollie, had sudden issues with her hip or nerves or something and had to be put to sleep....Two pets in two weeks. Let's just say I'm not the happiest person right now. If I get my taxes in and get a decent return I am looking to buy a tombstone for her, and am thinking of doing a memorial drawing for mom, as she's not handling it well at all. There was no real time to process it, as it was just suddenly this afternoon her back end just basically stopped working and she'd yelp and yelp in pain if she tried to pull it up....She was doing really well too over the Winter with her hips not bothering her much at all...I'm glad I got to see her last week at least, though wish I could've been there to say good-bye too...

I think I mentioned it last post, but I bought this gorgeous journal when I went to Walmart Friday morning. I'll post a pic of it below. I haven't fully decided what I want to use it for though. I am thinking just as intended. A journal of everything and anything in my mind...I love blogging, but there are somethings I don't go into detail or repeat on here as I know how it can get for some of the people reading it. You don't want to hear how depressed I am and how much I miss my hubby and all the stupid little shit at work or with my roommates in every post. I brief over the "highlights" of things outside the realm of my ED, as this is primarily what this blog is for. If you ever want to hear more, let me know lol but there is SO much going on in my head I don't like to ramble for hours on here. I am thinking of making my Wicca blog on this account though, as I kind of abandoned my old one...and possibly a writing one, but I'm still iffy on the idea of posting my writing online like this, so we'll see.

Anywhoo, I have rambled. I am going to head offline here soon, after commenting of course, and possibly start working on a plan for the next couple weeks for eating to get back on track, and will be sure to post any info "tomorrow". Night all! Stay Strong!

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